Jamboree man rubbed at his head and thought for a moment. “Ah!” he exclaimed, in the most exclamatory voice ever. “I’ve used the wrong damn powder. That was the shake powder for me evening drink!”
Skellian and Joe McShoots looked at each other, confused. “Well,” Skellian said, “Hurry, Jamboree, damn yer!”
Jamboree man rummaged around some more in his satchel, looking for the correct powder. He pulled out three small vials full of purple liquid, a magnifying glass, a coil of string, four golden pins, a couple of silver coins, a turnip, a key, and finally another small bag of powder. “Now, gentlemen, you may want to pull your socks right the fuck up.”
Skellian scratched his head. “I’m not wearing -“
McShoots punched him in the arm. “You idiot, Skell…”
“Get down!” Jamboree shouted. He threw the new powder out in front of him, and as it touched the army of half-men, it caused an enormous purple explosion. Limbs flew off in every direction imaginable. The alleyway was littered with horse heads, goat feet, men’s eyeballs, toes, fingers. You name it.
“Holy Dinglefreem!” yelled Joe McShoots. “You did it, Jamboree. Now let’s get the damn hell out of here!”
Some time later they came to a vine covered wooden door. Jamboree pushed it open and they stepped out into a dark forest. Tall, looming trees of grey and green bent over them like old, disabled giants. All around them, the ground was thick with bushes and prickly things. So many prickly things. Oh for the love of fuck, will someone please take away the prickly things?
“So …” Jamboree said. “We’re out. I’ve got to go my own way, Skell. I’m sorry. I’ve got business to take care of in my homeland. Where will you go?”
Skellian shed a small tear, then took another dredge of whiskey from his boot. “I don’t know, Jamboree. I don’t know anywhere’s else, ya know?”
Jamboree man thought for a second, then produced a small brown map from his satchel. “Skell, take this here map. It’s got places and things on it, and you use it to get to said places.”
Skellian choked. “Wow. Well, where would you recommend, Jamboree? I mean, shit, there’s like, twenty places on here. Or sumthin’.”
Jamboree man smiled, and his eye also filled with a small tear. “Oh Skell. That’s the beauty of a map. You can go any place you want. Explore. Go on an adventure. Just go wherever it takes you. Meet new people. Do new things. You’re free now. You do what you wanna do, ya feel?”
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